The Language of Trauma, Part 7: Complex Trauma
As a trauma therapist, I often work with people who don’t realize they’ve experienced trauma. They think because their pain didn’t come from one catastrophic event, it isn't trauma. Instead it developed from what was missing: safety, emotional presence, consistency, love. This is what we call complex trauma and it leads to Complex Post Traumatic Stress.
The DSM-5-TR is the US standard to diagnose psychological symptoms. It identifies Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and lists the symptoms warranting the diagnosis. Complex PTSD (or C-PTSD) is not found in the DSM-5-TR, but likely will be in the future. At Rezak Therapy, we tend to drop the "D" in "PTSD" because its symptoms are the body's natural response to trauma. We don’t like referring to these responses to trauma as "disordered."
What is Complex Trauma?
Complex trauma results from prolonged exposure to stress in interpersonal relationships. It seeps into our inner world, subtly steering our reactions, beliefs, and connections. As such, it differs from acute trauma, or single-incident trauma, explored in our last post in this trauma series.
In our post on Relational Trauma, we explore how attachment wounds from early caregivers shape adult relationships. Complex trauma is often built on this same foundation.
Complex trauma develops from ongoing emotional neglect, verbal abuse, parentification, witnessing domestic violence, or growing up in environments where safety was unpredictable. It may also stem from surviving racism, misogyny, poverty, or immigration-related stress.
It involves repeated, compounded wounds over months or years—often in formative relationships. It’s trauma woven into daily life.
Curious how systemic oppression affects the nervous system? Visit our post on Social and Collective Trauma, where we examine trauma embedded in community and culture.
“Being able to feel safe with other people is probably the single most important aspect of mental health. ”
Signs of Complex Trauma
If you’ve experienced complex trauma, you might recognize these experiences:
You feel emotionally flooded during minor conflicts
You can’t relax around people, even those who love you
You tend to self-abandon in relationships to avoid conflict
You struggle with chronic shame, self-blame, or distrust of your own feelings
You experience “emotional flashbacks” that pull you into despair or fear without clear cause
These symptoms may reflect Complex Post Traumatic Stress, even if you don’t meet the criteria for traditional PTSD. That’s why trauma therapy that understands complex trauma is so essential.
Four Questions for Reflection
Gently explore your inner landscape with these trauma-informed reflection prompts:
What did I need as a child that I never received?
What roles did I take on in order to be accepted or stay safe?
Where do I still carry the belief that I am “too much” or “not enough”?
What does my nervous system feel like when I’m in the presence of safety—or the absence of it?
In our post on Co-Regulation, we explain how nervous system healing begins not with logic, but with connection—something many survivors of complex trauma never experienced consistently.
How Trauma Therapy Can Help
Working with a trauma therapist who understands complex trauma can offer a safe, structured space to begin healing. Here are a few supportive approaches used in trauma therapy at Rezak Therapy in Pasadena, CA.
Trauma is held in the body. Modalities like Somatic Psychotherapy and Brainspotting help calm the nervous system and restore a sense of embodiment.
2. Internal Family Systems (IFS) and Parts Work
IFS explores your feeling states (like the overachiever, the protector, or the wounded child) and helps you build compassion for yourself rather than judgment. It can also allow quiet parts a louder voice, bullying parts a “time-out”, and wounded parts space to grieve.
3. Polyvagal-Informed Therapy & Co-Regulation
Based on Dr. Stephen Porges’ work, this approach centers on helping your nervous system feel safe through relational healing and gentle attunement.
4. Attachment-Based Therapy
Relational trauma needs relational repair. Our trauma therapists can offer consistent, attuned presence that helps you build earned secure attachment.
5. Creative Expression
Journaling, poetry, visual art, and movement provide outlets for emotions that words can’t always reach. These practices offer ways to integrate trauma somatically and symbolically.
You Were Never Meant to Carry This Alone
In The Body Keeps the Score, Dr. Bessel van der Kolk writes: “Trauma is not just an event that took place sometime in the past; it is also the imprint left by that experience on mind, brain, and body.” That imprint can be healed.
You are not too sensitive, too needy, or too broken. Your nervous system adapted to survive a lack of safety. With trauma therapy, you can learn to trust your body and restore self-compassion. You can rewire your reactions to perceived-threats based on new experiences of connection. You can use your lifetime of experiences to develop new ways to cope with big emotions, rather than relying on those developed by your best thinking when you were a child.
Want to explore the shame that arises from being rejected for who you are? Check out our blog on Identity Trauma for insights on healing wounds around race, gender, and selfhood.
Resources for Complex Trauma & Complex Post Traumatic Stress
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker
No Bad Parts by Richard Schwartz
Let’s Begin Your Healing Journey Together
The path to healing begins with an attuned relationship that gently rebuilds your sense of safety. At Rezak Therapy, we specialize in trauma therapy for those living with Complex Post Traumatic Stress and long-term relational wounds.
If you’re ready to feel grounded, connected, and safe in the world, I invite you to schedule a free consultation. You weren’t meant to live in survival mode forever. Restoration is your next chapter.
